Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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