Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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