i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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