i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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