we're blogging at a bar
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize