now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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