so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
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