I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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