Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
