um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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