Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
