I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Everything about him screamed your future.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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