never play flip cup with pint glasses
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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