I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize