Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
