yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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