you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
