was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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