I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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