We're like a lot better than the average bears
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
