i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize