i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
