Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize