There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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