with your own penis?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
