My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize
