I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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