I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
