Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize