A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
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Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
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I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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