what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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