Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
