I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
