how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
