Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Someone shattered a urinal.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I just want to make out with him forever
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
