i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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