Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
