I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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