they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize