Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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