you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
She bit a glass in half.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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