After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize