Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
