He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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