Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize