hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I need to sanitize my soul.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
