apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is classic penis vs brain.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I am available for nakedness
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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