all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
