some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
