why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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